Check In~Sorry about not posting for a while!

I'm sorry I haven't been posting very much, i've been quite distracted lately.  But I am now 144 pounds.  I have less than 10 pounds to go for my weight loss goal.  135 would be awesome, but once I reach it, I will probably try to push it down to 130.  I want my BMI to be out of 23, and into 21 and 22.  I weighed myself this morning, and practically screamed I was so happy.

Yesterday I hung out with my friend Andrea and Reagan.  We were at Andreas house.  A little girl named Victoria came over.  It was fine for a little while, but we wanted to talk about some stuff a little bit mature for her age.  Me and Reagan slowly began to exchange looks.  Then we got a notebook and started passing notes.  I told Andrea that someone needed to tell Victoria to go home.  I didn't want to do it, because I had just met her, and don't like to hurt peoples feelings.  Reagan didn't want to do it either.  So we played Eny Meni Miny Mo.  Andrea had to tell her.  Victoria ended up storming out, and Andrea's mother came up and asked if something was wrong.  Andrea just told Victoria she wanted to spend some time alone with me and Reagan, she didn't say anything wrong.  I still felt bad though....

I went to Awanas with Andrea.  I used to go a long time ago, but I don't anymore.  I was excited to see Briton.  I had a little crush on him when I was younger.  Sadly, it didn't go away.  I was so nervous my heart was the speed of a hummingbirds.  We were talking.  I told her I thought me might of forgot about me.  He said "well how could I forget that face".  I froze, and Reagan told me my face turned pink.  I think it was unintentional, at least I hope, because he just has a flirty, witty personality.  But theres really not a lot of ways to take that sentence.  I was already really nervous, so he caught me off guard  I just hope he finds it funny, like I do.  I ended up laughing about it later.  It was nice to see other people to.  Maybe I could go next year....

I'm going to get a boyfriend, I know it!

"He won't like you if you're not thin, and pretty.  And girls who are thin are pretty.  If you want to have a chance to get a boyfriend before you're 18, you have to be skinnier.  He meets girls all the time, and they are skinnier than you.  So you have to live up to them."


That is what goes through my mind when i'm exercising   I have a reason to be exercising  the thing I hate doing.  Obviously its working, so I can't stop now.  I burned 221 calories... So I will be past my goal weight if everyday were like today in five weeks. Then I will be thin and pretty, and boys will like me, and I will get a boyfriend.  I don't want a serious relationship or anything.  I just want a cute boy to hold hands with and talk to.  Thats all.  But boys only want to do that with skinny pretty girls.  I think i'm pretty.  I also think that when I lose weight, I get prettier.  So thats why I exercise, and eat between 900 and 1200 calories a day.  Thats why I exercise  and don't eat anything unhealthy.  Even the frozen fruit bars I eat are 70 calories and all natural with real strawberries.  I take acne medication, and now have barely any acne, besides the scars on my cheeks.  And I get along with most people I meet, and people generally enjoy my company, so I think my personality is ok.... And, although i'm a Leo, I try to make sure I don't lose my temper too often.  I think I will get a boyfriend, just don't know who!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, so I am like really excited now.  I am currently 146 pounds.  Only 11 pounds till my goal.  But some things happened that I am very..... ECSTATIC ABOUT!!

Ok, I went to the park on saturday with my friend Jaydin, my dad, and my nephew A.J.  At first it was normal, I swung on the swings, A.J. played on the slides, and Jaydin pushed these kids on the Merry Go Round.  But then, I got up, and was playing with A.J.  This boy, who looked to be a little bit older than me, walked over to the swings.  He was kind of cute.  When I looked over at him, I found him looking at me!  Now I thought maybe he was looking at me BECAUSE I was looking at him.  So I looked away, and tried to be cool.  I ended up tripping! Right in front of him.  I was so embarrassed.  But I got up as fast as a speeding bullet, and and went to find A.J.  A.J. wanted to use the swings, lucky me.... So I took him over to the swings and said "A.J. i'm not going to push you every five seconds."  Then the boy said "Well thats not very nice, what is he, like 4?".  We ended up getting into a little conversation   Then he said "Well please don't fall again or i'll feel bad for you and have to help you up.".  I was completely and thoroughly embarrassed.  Me and him ended up talking for about 2 and a half hours.  He had to leave, and then I left with the rest of my group.  He told me that it was "his park" and that he would like to see me there again.  I was shocked.  This had never, ever, happened to me before.  I think he actually liked me.  We are complete opposites  but you know what they say, opposites attract right?  

And then, the next day something else happened.  Ok, well before I left my church because of some family issues, I had a crush on this really cute boy named Connor.  And, I thought maybe he liked me, but I wasn't all that sure.  And I had low self esteem and didn't think someone like him (cute, REALLY funny) could like me.  So after I left the church I gave up and told myself I would probably never see him again.  My grandmother who still goes to that church, acted really weird and was like "guess who said hi to you, you'll never guess....".  I was like "someone from awanas?" (awanas was a thing I used to go to quite a while ago). She was like "No...fine i'll tell you."  Turns out it was CONNOR.  And then she said "I can keep a secret a long time, but enough's enough.".  She told me that a few months ago (around the time me and Connor started talking, and I started liking him) he was saying how much he LIKED ME!!!!!!!!  AHHH!!!!!!!  I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!!!  And, I don't know if its only "like" or "like like" but it doesn't really matter to me!  Just to know that he even "likes" me is good enough!  When I found out, I proceeded to scream "I GOT TO CALL ANDREA, SHE IS GOING TO BE-" and then I slammed my door to my room.  So now, I have a boy who I just met and hope to meet again soon, and a boy who I really like, who may "like" or ""like like" me!   I'm going to ask Grandma to tell Connor hi for me, and ask her to give him my number.  Because I won't be able to talk to him any other way.  But I hope she doesn't make it sound like I like him or anything. I mean...I do...but......still.  I don't handle embarrassment very well.  I'm going to tell Andrea (My best friend in the world) today after her school ends.  Someone will be screaming, I don't know who.  

OUR PROBLEMS COUNT TO!

I hate it when I tell my dad a problem or dilemma of mine, and he says "Well other kids are starving...".  Look, I know other kids are starving, but does that mean my problems don't count???? Someone will always be suffering more than you, but that doesn't mean your problems don't count.  Don't ever let anyone tell you that bullcrap.  Because they are basically telling you shut up, I don't care about your shit.

She's Really Pathetic.

Ugh...well I have new allergy pills, and my grandmother sees them on the counter.  I snatch them away, and tell her they're mine.  Because I thought she was going to put them somewhere.  An hour later, my mother gets back from wherever she was. She comes in my room and is like "Kati, what did you have earlier?!?!".  Come to find out, my grandmother told her they looked like birth control pills! All she's ever wanted to do was get me in trouble, and stuck her fat head in places she shouldn't.  I swear, if she wasn't my blood, or as old as she is, I would slug her in the mouth.  She acts just as young as I am.  A few months ago, I came to the decision of becoming a vegetarian.  To this day she scoffs, and tells me to go to hell, and that i'm being selfish not eating the food they eat.    Yet still, with all this, my parents blame me for the way she acts.  I thought it was the older person's (by 55 YEARS!) job to be mature, and not start the fight.  Yet I never do that anymore.  When I was 7, yeah I acted a little bratish and horrible toward her.  But now, i'm getting too old for her to act like this.  She doesn't have authority over me.  She really never has.  Yet, she gets up close to me, in my face, and acts all tough.  But, although she may be heavy-set, I am taller and stronger than her.  And, because she is at her age, I can't do anything about her foolish, immature behavior.  I have told her repeatedly not to touch me, or confront me in such a violent manner, just because she knows I won't fight back.  Yet she continues to do it. She did it in front of my father, I pushed her away from me, and I got in trouble.  She makes little side comments to.  Like when me and my mom are in an argument, or simply bickering  she tries to join in.  Even though both of us have told her plenty of times that she is not included in those fights.  She is not aloud to punish me or tell me what to do.  Told to her by me, AND MY MOM.  But  she threw away my nail polish as "punishment" one day.  Then my mom continues to tell me that its MY FAULT that she doesn't have a relationship with her mother.  Well, as far as i'm concerned,  grandma can go to hell.  I'm tired of her bullcrap, because she's really pathetic.  Think of me as you like, but if you were put in this situation, would you honestly act any different than I do? If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions, email me at: Ilovesmesomeanime@gmail.com

http://animelover349.tumblr.com/

Great news everyone!  I've started a tumblr blog!  You can go check it out!  http://animelover349.tumblr.com/

But its like this one, except more pictures!

Doing good things is hard.

I'm supposed to have 8 cups of water a day...  How am I supposed to have 8 cups of water a day?!!??!?!?!  I don't really drink that often at all.  So 8 cups of water is really hard for me.  But its good for you......  Why are things that are good for you often torture.  Like, I don't like to do the treadmill, but its good for me.  I don't like to drink that much, but its good for me....

But someday my legs are gonna look like this!  THEY ARE!